Sometimes I hear a song and I think, "Damn. That's what I've been trying to say this whole time." It works very well for me, considering I can then guide a person to this song and say, "Hey. This is what I want to tell you." Is it wrong to not express my own self with my own words? Maybe. But when someone else can verbalize my feelings so eloquently in my favorite medium, I just have a lot of gratitude towards them.
Last night, I fell asleep on the couch at 9:45 pm. I woke up at 1:48 am in a state of frenzy. I was supposed to watch "The Good Wife," eat some more popcorn, and then continue my work. Those plans did not work out so well, as I ended up in my bed with thoughts racing at 1.72 million miles per hour:
What was I going to do first thing in the morning? When was I going to load gear into my car? Where was I going to watch the Bears game this weekend? I have to remember to call the dentist. I need to book a plane ticket to California. WTF is going on in my life? Wait a second, I went through a full year of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to stop this. Let me stop thinking. Now I have music stuck in my head. Now, I'm thinking about Kate Nash and I'm thinking about this song:
For those of you concerned, these are the important parts of the Kate Nash rant at the end:
I don't know how all people haven't got mental health problems
thinking is one of those stressful things I've ever come across
and not being able to articulate what I want to say drives me crazy
I think i should try and read more books and learn some new words
my sister used to read the dictionary i'm going to start with that
I'd like to travel I want to see India and the pyramids, a whale and that race with all the bycicles in France
I'm not sure about rivers they scare me
but I love swimming I'm good at it
when I swim I think about numbers, I count the laps......
I like sitting in the park and i like walking through it
I like taking my dogs there and friends and i like being alone
I like flowers and simplicity
I like compassion and thoughtful gifts
I like being able to shout but I wish I could be quiet
but when I'm quiet people think I'm sad and usually i am
sometimes when I'm at a busy trainstation somewhere big with noisy trains like kings cross
I feel like putting down my bags and shouting out because I have something to say
don't you want to share the guilt?
don't think just try and sleep!
Damn it. How did Kate Nash know exactly what I was thinking? She even told me to stop thinking and to go to sleep!
She's even so "real," that when I saw her live, she was completely obliterated and nearly knocked all the monitors off the stage. If we go back to my previous post, well now, that's rock n' roll. I really wish Kate wasn't always this drunk on stage, because she's got some amazingly depressing lyrics. Her stage show is all about the crazy shit, but if you want to feel like crap about yourself, just watch this:
Even the cinematography has the outsider looking in effect to accompany the song. Watching Kate Nash through a monitor on our screen? Now that's deep. Deep like the song. I'll leave you in the shallow end:
Everything's better with a British accent.
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